FFF Diva Reflection: "Reward Myself with Stuff, Not Food" System

Mo's "Reward myself with stuff, not food" System: THE STORY

I had a really great ♥ to ♥ with my Operation Boot Camp instructor Melody this morning after camp. She asked me a really honest question: "What do you reward yourself with?" My answer: "Ummm food." Mel responded: "It's time to reward yourself differently. For example I reward myself with pedicures. Don't let your reward force you to take a step backwards in your progress."

Mo's "Reward myself with stuff, not food" System: THE REWARD

I lost 10 lbs. since last month and kept it off (even during the holiday!). As a reward I finally bought myself a runner's Garmin GPS watch to track my speed and mileage. My reward for the next 10 lbs. loss: a brand new pair of running shoes. "Success belongs to those who want it and believe it." Boy do I believe it!



Garmin - Forerunner 305 GPS: "Maximize your workout productivity with this GPS training wristwatch that allows you to keep track of your calories burned and workout pace."

Following a rigorous exercise plan is not a problem for me. Following a clean eating plan and pre-planning my caloric intake for the day/week HUGE PROBLEM for me. Finally I got it under SOME control this past month and survived the first holiday with lbs. lost, not lbs. gained. However, I need to keep this gravy train going and it's going to be with actual activity or item rewards instead of food rewards!

Last month: 258 lbs.
Today 12/15: 248 lbs.

Next 5 reward goals (10 lbs. less):
238 = New pair of running shoes
228 = New pair of running pants
218 = A full body massage
208 = Mini training package of sessions with a personal gym trainer
198 = My 1st tattoo celebrating my weight loss when I hit under 200 lbs. for the first time since I was 18 years old. I turn 26 this coming March.

Overall goal weight is 145 lbs., however I am NOT even going to think of that number. Small steps. I am going to think: "MO, WHAT DO I NEED TO DO TO GET UNDER 200 lbs.? NOW DO IT." And YOU can DO IT too. I believe in you.


<3 FFF Diva Mo

A Fierce Fat Filipina Diva Review: Drop Dead Diva

Pilot (Episode 1) | myLifetime.com

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Episode 1: Summary

Season 1: Episode 1. Airs: 07/12/09. Watch the premiere episode of "Drop Dead Diva." When beautiful-but-vapid model wannabe Deb has a fatal car accident, she suddenly finds herself in front of Heaven's gatekeeper, Fred, who declares her a self-centered "zero." Outraged, she attempts to persuade Fred to return her to her shallow existence but is accidentally relegated to the body of the recently deceased Jane Bingum. A brilliant, thoughtful and plus-size attorney with a loyal assistant, Teri, Jane has always lived in the shadow of her more comely colleagues whereas Deb has always relied on her external beauty. Now, by a twist of fate and a bolt of divine intervention, Deb must come to terms with inhabiting Jane's plus-size frame in the ultimate showdown between brains and beauty.

A Fierce Fat Filipina Diva's Review: I love it. Not just because Margaret Cho plays the executive assistant of the main character Jane (well partially). All my life growing up I turned to television to help me feel happy, test my emotions, fill my head with knowledge, but deep down inside selfishly I was analyzing television to see if they would reflect something that represented me.

First case in point: Margaret Cho's early 1990's first all Asian-American television show called "All American Girl." It was the first show of it's kind to showcase the humor, frustration, & pain at times that Asian-Americans go through, however American television audiences were not ready for something like that. Therefore, it lasted only 1 season on ABC, but is now available on DVD!

Second case in point: MTV's (excuse me, RANDY JACKSON's) "America's Next Best Dance Crew." It was the first show to really highlight a known stereotypical fact: FILIPINOS can dance. There were several regions represented on that show from all over the nation and YET they managed to find dance crews even in the MIDWEST that had at least one Filipino. Hate to say it, but it help but Filipino-Americans on the map as natual born dancers...however don't let me forget Charice Pampengko...she reminded the WORLD that Filipinos can SING. However, that is another blog, another story.

So what about Lifetime's "Drop Dead Diva"? How do I relate to it? Well, because I am fat, young, a professional, & want something more out of life. This show relates to me on many personal levels, mainly because I too shop at Lane Bryant, want to fight for injustice in the world, & love good lawyerly talk (hell I was a Political Science major). But most of all this show from it's storylines, actors/actresses, jokes, cases, etc. really let's audience members help feel at least for a second what it is like to be different (not just fat or be a woman in a man's world, etc.) in a world that tells you you need to be a certain way to be noticed and appreciated in this society. This show highlights that negativity in society, but also reminds us in the best way possible the importance of loving yourself for who you are (50lbs more or not).

So what now? Yes, I know I am on a health kick. I know I participate in a 6am cardio boot camp Monday-Friday. I know I am training for a 1/2 marathon, which is on OCTOBER 4th (8 weeks left). I know for my height of 5'2'' I am suggested to be 125lbs-140lbs, but in reality I am closer to 270lbs currently. I exercise everyday not because someone tells me I am fat or ugly (although I do get many comments from different strangers & relatives who are think they are helping, but are not), but because I used to weigh 320lbs & was a size 28. I used to have Sleep Apnea that required me to use a machine to breathe at night while I slept, because I was too fat and prevented me from breathing. This past November 2008 I weighed 224lbs. Today I am closer to 270lbs. What happened? Life happened. However, I am NOT going to let lame excuses prevent me from my goal weight.

I might be fat, but I am mighty. I might be fat, but I am proud. I might be fat, but I am confident I will succeed. I might be fat, but this is the first time in a year that I am sincerely and genuinely happy with who I am & what I look like. I am FIERCE. Exercise and a healthy lifestyle change will help me look like the "after" I have been chasing for not the "before" but it will be on my terms and on my realistic and healthy timeline. The best part of it all...I am not doing stupid liposuction or lap band surgery. I am doing it with healthy eating & exercise.

Fellow Fierce Fat Filipina Diva,
Mo : )