FFF Diva Update: Take Me or Leave Me

"Take Me or Leave Me" from the Broadway Musical RENT

"Take me for what I am, who I was meant to be. And if you give a damn, take me baby or leave me." -Maureen from RENT, 1996

Usually I write an end of the year re-cap when it's the ACTUAL end of the year, but I figure since it's December already then it's close enough. = )

2010 you have definitely been a year of many UPS and many DOWNS, but ALL were life lessons to keep me moving forward. Here are some selected highlights:



January 2010
*Ran 5K Run for the Homeless in Fremont, CA = first race of the year!
*Decided I would take running more seriously by running at least 20 miles a week (around 1,000 miles by the end of the year was the goal)

February 2010
*Ran 10K Valentine's Day Run in Campbell, CA
*Actually celebrated V-Day with a young man I was dating
*I was no longer single, thus ending my 3 year relationship drought

March 2010
*Got a horrible chest cold that restricted me from any exercise for two weeks before my first marathon
*Completed my first full marathon (Los Angeles Marathon) on my 25th birthday (March 21st) with my sister Leilani
*One week after my birthday my boyfriend broke up with me

April 2010
*Ran the Santa Cruz 10K Race with my sister (1st race with rain!)
*Got featured in the "Camper Spotlight" section of the national Operation Boot Camp website blog
*Celebrated one year with Operation Boot Camp (1 year as a participant!)

May 2010
*Left my job at the Youth Leadership Institute after 4 years to finally finish my MBA graduate degree
*Was unemployed for the first time in my adult life
*Had no health insurance, until the Health Care Bill passed (now coverage until 26)
*Celebrated my one year anniversary of my first competitive running race: 5K Marin Human Race

June 2010
*Got hired at a law firm as a receptionist
*Worked weekends at Bath and Body Works
*Got hired to do Poltical Organizing for June elections
*Got elected to be Vice-President of Membership for the Silicon Valley Young Democrats

July 2010
*Ran the Wharf to Wharf race in Santa Cruz/Capitola with the Ladies of OBC
*Became certified in CPR/AED/First Aid for Child/Infant/Adult

August 2010
*Rallied, organized, and worked it for Young Dems everywhere
*Started my 2nd to last semester of my MBA graduate studies
*Officiated a friend's wedding on a beach bluff in beautiful Half Moon Bay

September 2010
*A once in a lifetime opportunity came twice, but it wasn't meant to be
*Started my position of Secretary for the Dominican Alumni Board of Directors
*Ran the Run Until the End of Summer 10K Race with my Operation Boot Camp family (they literally helped me cross the finish line--I was so dehydrated that day)

October 2010
*Attended the California Governor's Debate at Dominican University of California (my alma mater)
*Completed my first full month at Operation Boot Camp with perfect attendance
*Completed my first Nike Women's 1/2 Marathon AND PR'ed it for a Tiffany & Co. necklace
*Completed my first 5K obstacle filled race called the Warrior Dash in full costume dress up as Thing 2 from Dr. Suess
*Started dating again

November 2010
*Survived Black Friday retail hell
*Survived 3 Thanksgiving events and didn't throw up! I ate relatively well.
*Ran the Morgan Hill 1/2 Marathon even though I was out sick from school, work, and exercise the week leading up to it
*Finally told the truth on my food log

December 2010
*Back in my OBC and running element
*Back to working out at the gym every weekday
*Back to stretching & foam rolling everyday

What will 2011 bring? I don't know. But I do know that it's easier for me to motivate other people to succeed and in the end I sabotage myself by making excuses and doing shortcuts. I always compared my weight loss to other people's weight loss. Totally drove me nuts. I always lied on my food log. I have been in my 250s for the last three years and even though I am stronger, more fit, and can run (unlike before), I am still FAT. I will no longer be comparing myself to others. I will no longer cut myself short. I will push myself 10% harder. I will continue cleaner eating, consistent exericse, and know that even if I had a bad day tomorrow would be a new slate. No more emotional eating, no more excuses, just success! Don't get me wrong, I have come a long way in my weight loss journey, but I could have been there already and for that I feel like a failure, a fake, and a phony. But on the other hand I now have the tools, knowledge, and experience of what TO DO and what NOT TO DO when it comes to living a healther lifestyle.

Bottomline: I WILL NO LONGER BE BOTHERED BY OTHER PEOPLE'S EXPECTATIONS OF ME. I AM JUST GOING TO DO ME. = )

Take me or leave me,
<3 FFF Diva Mo